A piece of paradise

Cherry lips sooth me with your kisses.
Wrap me tight like sticky mango rice in a banana leaf.
How clever you are reading your books.
But you don’t understand how I long for you to read me

To be able to understand my heartaches and why I weep.
That you would know the pain I have for indigent people.
As I realize I too am indigent.
Needing your comfort, your friendship, your conversation.

For you to lie next to me, listening to the sounds of the night.
Inhaling the fresh air and the rain tap tapping on my roof.

I cannot compare anymore.
I long for the peace and quietness of nature.
You want to be entertained.
I long to chat for hours about religion, god, meditation, purpose...
Philosophising about life, the good parts and bad.

You don’t understand me.
You try do comfort with logic.
But all I need is to be understood, to have something to live for.
To live a life with meaning.

Thank you for trying babe.
Trying to comfort me when I’m sad and feel like I’m going insane.
For reasoning with me and trying to understand.

I used to have a heart that aches for the poor in spirit and heart.
Those who are physically and emotionally drained.
I wanted to help make the world a better place.
Plant seeds that will grow into big trees where people can rest in their shade.
I wanted to give to others cause Jesus gave his life for me.

But now there is no more Jesus and I don’t have a reason anymore.
Except for the burning in my heart.
The longing to give a little piece of my paradise.
It seems so selfish to keep it all for myself.